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Soren Kierkegaard

“Anxiety is the dizziness of freedom.”
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Steven Wright

“When I woke up this morning my girlfriend asked me, ‘Did you sleep good?’ I said ‘No, I made a few mistakes.'”
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Wilson Mizner

“A fellow who is always declaring he’s no fool usually has his suspicions.”
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Al Capp

“[Abstract art is] a product of the untalented, sold by the unprincipled to the utterly bewildered.”
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H. L. Mencken

“A judge is a law student who marks his own examination papers.”
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Oscar Wilde

“The only thing that sustains one through life is the consciousness of the immense inferiority of everybody else, and this is a feeling that I have always cultivated.”
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Sir Arthur Conan Doyle

“The case has, in some respects, been not entirely devoid of interest.”
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Mark Twain

“I have never taken any exercise except sleeping and resting.”
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Groucho Marx

“A child of five would understand this. Send someone to fetch a child of five.”
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Mark Twain

“Good breeding consists of concealing how much we think of ourselves and how little we think of the other person.”
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