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Irv Kupcinet

“What can you say about a society that says that God is dead and Elvis is alive?”
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Nancy Astor

“One reason I don’t drink is that I want to know when I am having a good time.”
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Bob Hope

“A bank is a place that will lend you money if you can prove that you don’t need it.”
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Blaise Pascal

“I have discovered that all human evil comes from this, man’s being unable to sit still in a room.”
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Andrew W. Mathis

“It is bad luck to be superstitious.”
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Benjamin Disraeli

“What we anticipate seldom occurs; what we least expected generally happens.”
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Mark Twain

“The rule is perfect: in all matters of opinion our adversaries are insane.”
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Ambrose Bierce

“Cogito cogito ergo cogito sum (I think that I think, therefore I think that I am.)”
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J. Frank Dobie

“The average Ph.D. thesis is nothing but a transference of bones from one graveyard to another. ”
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Woody Allen

“I tended to place my wife under a pedestal.”
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