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Lily Tomlin

“The trouble with the rat race is that even if you win, you’re still a rat.”
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Voltaire

“Anything too stupid to be said is sung.”
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Doug Larson

“The aging process has you firmly in its grasp if you never get the urge to throw a snowball.”
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Oscar Wilde

“Why was I born with such contemporaries?”
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James Thurber

“It had only one fault. It was kind of lousy.”
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Woody Allen

“My one regret in life is that I am not someone else.”
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Paul Johnson

“The word ‘meaningful’ when used today is nearly always meaningless.”
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John Kenneth Galbraith

“Meetings are indispensable when you don’t want to do anything.”
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Steven Wright

“If you shoot at mimes, should you use a silencer?”
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Carl Reiner

“A lot of people like snow. I find it to be an unnecessary freezing of water.”
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