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Mark Twain

“The human race has one really effective weapon, and that is laughter.”
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W. L. George

“Wars teach us not to love our enemies, but to hate our allies.”
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Voltaire

“Doubt is not a pleasant condition, but certainty is absurd.”
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Orson Welles

“Now we sit through Shakespeare in order to recognize the quotations.”
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James Thurber

“Early to rise and early to bed makes a male healthy and wealthy and dead.”
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Unknown

“After all is said and done, a lot more will be said than done.”
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Robert Benchley

“As for me, except for an occasional heart attack, I feel as young as I ever did.”
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Dan Quisenberry

“The future is much like the present, only longer.”
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Lily Tomlin

“Man invented language to satisfy his deep need to complain.”
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Wolfgang Pauli

“This isn’t right. This isn’t even wrong.”
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