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Joey Adams

“A psychiatrist is a fellow who asks you a lot of expensive questions your wife asks for nothing.”
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Henry S. Haskins

“The time to stop talking is when the other person nods his head affirmatively but says nothing.”
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George Bernard Shaw

“The reasonable man adapts himself to the world; the unreasonable one persists in trying to adapt the world to himself. Therefore all progress depends on the unreasonable man.”
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Oscar Levant

“The only difference between the Democrats and the Republicans is that the Democrats allow the poor to be corrupt, too.”
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J. Paul Getty

“The meek shall inherit the Earth, but not its mineral rights.”
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James Thurber

“It is better to know some of the questions than all of the answers.”
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Ken Hakuta

“Lack of money is no obstacle. Lack of an idea is an obstacle.”
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Laurence J. Peter

“The incompetent with nothing to do can still make a mess of it.”
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Aaron Copland

“The whole problem can be stated quite simply by asking, ‘Is there a meaning to music?’ My answer would be, ‘Yes.’ And ‘Can you state in so many words what the meaning is?’ My answer to that would be, ‘No.'”
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Lichty and Wagner

“Oh, I don’t blame Congress. If I had $ 600 billion at my disposal, I’d be irresponsible, too.”
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