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Dave Barry

“Skiing combines outdoor fun with knocking down trees with your face.”
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Dorothy Parker

“I’m never going to be famous. My name will never be writ large on the roster of Those Who Do Things. I don’t do any thing. Not one single thing. I used to bite my nails, but I don’t even do that any more.”
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Mark Twain

“Never put off until tomorrow what you can do the day after tomorrow.”
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E. W. Dijkstra

“The question of whether a computer can think is no more interesting than the question of whether a submarine can swim.”
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Paul Valery

“Politics is the art of preventing people from taking part in affairs which properly concern them.”
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Woody Allen

“Life is divided into the horrible and the miserable.”
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Leonard Louis Levinson

“History is the short trudge from Adam to atom.”
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Graffito

“Is there life before death?”
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Stanislaw J. Lec

“All is in the hands of man. Therefore wash them often.”
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Will Rogers

“Heroing is one of the shortest-lived professions there is.”
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